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The shocking truth about copywriters, content marketers and exclamation marks!

Good heavens! Copywriters turn out to be big fat liars! My newsletter yesterday was on the (thorny) subject of exclamation marks. I tested, as I always do, two subject lines: [A] OMG!!! This month’s newsletter!...

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A confession: I was wrong about copywriters who ‘love words’

I admit it. I’m a sham. Until a week ago, if anyone asked me what I did, I always said I was a copywriter. The end. A tradesman, not an artist. And definitely not a ‘writer’. I was wrong. And...

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Towards a transformative hermeneutics of linguistic periphrasticism, or, why do people love jargon?

In authoring this thought-leadership white paper my strategic roadmap was to build a key deliverable for continuous professional development and learnings. Er, what now? I said, I wrote this article to help you...

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Ten copywriting ‘rules’ you should break before you die

Rules, eh? Doncha just hate ’em? Do this. Don’t do that. Show me a rule and I’ll show you a baseball bat. Copywriting is plagued with rules. You know, you buy a book by someone who says they’re going to teach y...

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The Periodic Table of Corporate Writing

Sunfish scientists have been studying the elements of corporate writing for decades and have now identified the 16 most dangerous. Goggles and rubber gloves on please....

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The 7 telltale signs you’re reading “zombie copy”

She stands, screaming. Her feet refuse to move. She is rooted to the spot with terror. Slowly, inevitably, the bloody, walking corpse approaches. Arms outstretched, snarling, it reaches for her. It is hungry. A...

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The Copywriter’s Prayer

Oh Word, Let me compose sentences providing both meaning and pleasure. Guide me towards clarity, simplicity and truthfulness, And away from the seductive path of waffle, and the words whereof the weasel availet...

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Annals of dimwitted public signs #76,671

There’s a park where I walk Merlin, my Whippet. Here we are posing for our picture on www.mydogandme.me. Sometimes, horses kept by travellers stray onto the park. This eventually got too much for the coun...

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When copywriters start showing off

Anyone who has children – or has spent time with the little bl… I mean angels – will have uttered or heard that deathless phrase, “Stop showing off”. Usually as said offspring is disrupting a family lunch. Litt...

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